Ask A Mentor: Am I Too Friendly With My Boss?


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Am I Too Friendly With My Boss?

Compiled and edited by Julie Tereshchuk

Dear Mentors,

My friend says I’m too friendly with my supervisor, who I’ve known since I started working for the company as an intern; they hired me full-time after I graduated six years ago. My friend recently moved to the same town as my supervisor (most of the employees work remotely so I don’t work in the same town) and, when I was visiting my friend, my supervisor invited us over to her house for drinks with her and her husband.

We went along, and I had a great time. But, afterwards, my friend told me it was really weird, and had freaked her out. What should I do?




Dear Unaware,

This sounds like your friend’s issue, not yours. If you don’t have a problem with it, nor does your supervisor, and you haven’t been told or witnessed that it is causing an issue at your company or with your work performance, I think the answer to “What should I do?” Is “Nothing.”


Also if your supervisor invited both you and your friend over to her house, it sounds like she works to cultivate friendships, or at least friendly relationships, with those who report to her. It sounds like a management style that your friend will need to get used to at the organization.


Maura Thomas

About Women Communicators of Austin


  1. Jane Baxter Lynn says:

    I agree with Maura’s response. However, it does raise the broad difference between a mentor and a coach that I believe. For me, not necessarily everyone’s point of view, a mentor is someone who has no vested interest except to see you succeed. A coach is usually a paid coach who does have a vested interest because it is there business to see you succeed. For me one of the gray areas is one’s boss. Don’t they have a vested interest? My answer is yes. At the end of the day they have their job to protect. So, my caution would be by all means look to your boss as a coach, often the best ever, but always remember their vested interest so be careful how much you share. Once you leave, then make sure you turn them into your special mentors for life.

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