How To Manage Up: December Luncheon Recap

Managing our interactions with people is crucial to our heath. We all have difficult people to deal with, both at work and life in general. There’s bound to be one or maybe a few, that know how to push our buttons in just the right way.

Stop and think about the last time you had to communicate with one of these people. How did it go? Would you say your response was more of a reaction or a strategy?
Remember, reactions are unconscious and habitual while strategy is planned and deliberate based on the situation. With a strategy you consciously say ” What is the best way to deal with this person at this time?”

Our guest and speaker Anne Pritchard-Grady from Acclivity Performance pointed this out at the December AWC Austin luncheon. She’s a pro at dealing with conflict (just wait until she starts telling her life story!) and offered many tips for managing the difficult people around us.

Communicating Through Conflict

Modify Your Approach
Understand that behavior has nothing to do with your personality. Your personality is static- it is what it is. There is no good, bad, right or wrong when it comes to behavior, its just a reaction or emotional response. Anne explained there are four main types of behavior:
1. Driver
2. Analytical
3. Amiable
4. Expressive
Most people approach others in the way they want to be approached.
However, not everyone works the same way.
Stay in control of your reactions and you will control the situation. Your goal is not to be right, its to get something accomplished.

Know Client or Manager Goals
We tend to forget about other people’s agendas by getting lost in our own. The simplest way to change this is to ask your manager or client about their goals and more importantly their goals for you. The next time you are asked to do something, check it against this list to make sure its a priority for both parties.

Make Expectations Clear to all Parties
Anne suggests you become clear on your strengths and be wiling to ask for exactly what you want. Identify your skills and find tasks or communication styles that inspire you, not drain you. Talk with your clients or managers about these and don’t hesitate to ask for what will play to your strengths.

“You can either change the way you think and behave to get different results  or you settle on the results you are getting, based on the way you think and behave,” said Anne.

Making subtle changes over time with help you to recognize your own type of behavior and also those around you.

Now that 2011 has come a gone, try using some of these techniques as we had into the new year with a fresh perspective on dealing with difficult people.